Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Pictures from the Past





Little miss Sarah has been sharing more and more of her past. There is nothing horrible and overly shocking but to a mom that loves her little girl and is so thankful she is finally home- it is heartbreaking. As she learns more and more english we will straighten out the half truths from the truths but for now we just listen and talk together. Bless her sweet heart.

Sarah still loves it when Mom dresses her. (whenever we are in front of someone else such as at gymnastics she will do it herself but at home she loves it!) She gets chilled when my cold Minnesota hands touch her as she is putting on her jammies. I asked if she would get cold in China too because I know they did not use much heat and instead would layer the children up in clothes. She said no because they didn't wear pajamas they would just wear their clothes to bed and then wear them the next day, too. She said she never brushed her teeth, they would just go to bed. Now- there were many children so I am not trying to criticize the orphanage but again as her Mom it literally makes my heart ache.

With so many children and no overly protective parents there were many accidents. She spoke of a boy that was run over by a car, another boy broke a window, a girl poked her eyes with pencils- these children did not come back to the orphanage. Many babies died because they had clefts or were to weak to eat.

Sarah's orphanage was a good orphanage. I know she was loved by a special ayi- We have many pictures of them together. They were very kind and invited us to lunch at the orphanage but Sarah felt she could not do it. She left her home of 8.5 years, she was with us for less than 24 hours and she wanted nothing to do with the orphanage. KIDS need PARENTS. She must have been so frightened- frightened of all the unknowns that were ahead of her and frightened that she may have to go back and not have a family. Sweet precious girl...

I think our dear daughter believes that all children in China don't have parents but that people go there to get a child. She talks about a woman that had her in her tummy and then she threw her away (this is probably because she doesn't have the correct english words to explain what she thinks happened). I tell her that that woman is her birth Mommy and she loved her very much but she could not raise her, maybe she didn't have enough money or they already had a child. I tell her she wrapped her up in a blanket and put her in a safe place so the police would find her. When they found her they brought her to the hospital and then the orphanage. I tell her I came to get her as soon as we could but I love her so much and wish I could have been there sooner.

On Gotcha day the director of the orphanage handed us a bunch of pics and 2 cameras. It was so nice of them. I just got the pics put on a CD and down loaded them onto my computer.  They are such treasures and windows into a past that I was not part of... I wish I could have been there sooner for her. Thank you Jesus for our sweet Sarah!

5 comments:

Lori said...

Sweet little Sarah! I'm so glad she is opening up to you and sharing her past. I hope that she continues to do so and can sort out the facts from fiction.

Thanks for the CongraTulations! Ha!

You crack me up...

Nancy said...

Thanks for sharing Jean. You've touched my heart today. We are all so fortunate to be parents to these special children.

Sally- That Girl! said...

We found as Marissa's English got better she was able to tell us more about her life in Guatemala. Much of it we knew was not the best and hard to hear. It was interesting watching her going from showing us with gestures and visuals to attaching words to what she had been trying to tell us. It all started to make sense.

Your Sarah will have much more to say I am sure as she was much older. I can imagine it is hard to figure out what is true or not, but for her it is probably all true right now. It is her perception that no one else can have.

You are such a good momma to be working through all these things with her. It is much easier to act like there wasn't a life prior to us, but that is not the case with these precious ones!

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